RealTime Relationships
The principles of RealTime Speaking are incredibly effective in creating and maintaining deeply satisfying and fulfilling intimate relationships! This very interactive program will explore and transform the blocks, fears, and unconscious communication habits that prevent us from having deliriously happy, exciting, and loving relationships.
Relationship magic begins with authentic connection. First, you have to truly see the other person, not your projected fantasies, hopes, and desires. You have to help each other to know you as you want to be known, by speaking your truth all the time, and by asking for what you want. You have to listen as if your life depended on it.
Robert Rabbin quotes on intimate relationships:
Relationship magic begins with authentic connection: you have to truly see the other person, not your projected fantasies, hopes, and desires.
If you're disappointed in someone, see if you're disappointed in who they are or in who you wanted them to be. One is real, the other isn't.
For strong and vital relationships, give voice to any disappointment or resentment that you feel, immediately and without blame.
To nurture intimacy, connection, trust, and openness in your relationship(s), listen as if your life depended on it.
Help other people to know you as you want to be known, by speaking your truth all the time, and by asking for what you want from them.
If you want intimacy and connection in your relationship(s), you can't be afraid of what you want. It's OK to speak up for your desires.
Love, cherish, and adore your significant other, all the time. Serve their happiness. Listen to them. Play with them. Give them your heart.
"I love you until further notice" does not work. We have to nuture love every day. We have to find sincere and personal ways to show our love.
Impact:
Having invested a lot of time and energy on my own personal development over the past 10 years, I dug deep into my toolkit of knowledge and tried everything I knew to have my message heard. I'm sure Jim won't mind me saying that with each conversation I was met with either anger, defensiveness or blame. I couldn't understand how this wonderfully kind and caring human could be so loving one minute then so angry the next. I had never experienced a relationship where every conversations was such a struggle and so very frustrating.
Attending your workshop in the first week made me realise that I could try all the methods under the sun, but it would all fall on deaf ears if my partner wasn't prepared or didn't know how to truly listen and be present. To be totally honest with you I was at the point of being so overly frustrated with our conversations that I was ready to end the relationship.
Jim is more than happy for me to share with you how much of an impact your first workshop had on both of us:
On the way home in the car after the first evening, we started to talk about the workshop and as I was talking Jim appeared to be distracted and I felt he was uninterested in what I was saying. This really frustrated me and I began to feel there was no hope, here I was so very excited that Jim had heard one of the key aspects of communicating and it appeared to me like he didn't "get it". We began to argue, defensiveness and blame crept into the conversation. By the time we reached home I had resolved to end our relationship.
When we got home, I told Jim that we just weren't right for each other and that I wasn't been truly heard which in turn meant my needs in the relationship weren't been met, I wasn't prepared to go on any longer as I was continually feeling drained and tired. We discussed my decision, there was some more blame and defensiveness which was cementing my decision to end the relationship.
After about five minutes apart (Jim went to get changed) Jim came back and we began to talk again, however something had changed, gone was the anger from his eyes. He sat across from me in an open position and asked me to talk and he simply listened. He truly listened to me as I let out all the things I had been saying in the last six months. He sat there and listened, he was implementing all the strategies you had mentioned that night (he even sat on his hands so he wouldn't fidget, very cute). For the first time in six months I had been heard and it felt great. He listened without judgment, without taking any of it personally, without blame. For the first time we had the connection I had been longing for. Since that night the relationship has moved to new heights, out conversations are so much better, and we are not afraid to pull the other one up if we are not listening, or if we are being defensive or blaming the other person for our own actions. The relationship has moved into a beautiful space and my smile is back!
Robert, I would like to thank you for opening your home and heart and sharing your wisdom to others, when the student is ready the master will appear. I believe this to be the case for us.
Upon being welcomed, Robert informed us he hadn't prepared material and there was no predetermined direction for the two evenings. My wife looked at me nervously, but Robert's charisma and confidence kept us glued to him.
In fact, Robert had lied. He HAD prepared for the night — by investing decades of his life in understanding and modelling the principles of authentic communication.
What ensued was two thought-provoking, entertaining, life-enriching evenings that continue to help my wife and I as we endeavour to progress from a good relationship to a great one.
I've also seen a difference in the way my children and I relate as a result of attending Robert's workshop. I hadn't realised I'd slipped into the habit of giving my kids less than 100% of my focus when they wanted my attention. By changing that and becoming fully present the quality of our interactions has improved dramatically.
I recommend anyone in a relationship invest in attending Robert's workshop. The payoff of deeper, richer relationships where each party is comfortable to express themselves with complete authenticity without fear of blame or defensiveness is simply invaluable.
